YOU ARE NOT ALONE.
When it comes to sexuality, I have spent most of my life thinking I was "all alone." Like many others in the kink community, I burned with confusion, shame, and self-loathing as I tried to come to terms with my "unusual" sexual desires. And like many others, I found the Scene, only to fall prey to a serial predator. Confused, unsure what doctors to go to, and patronized by my scene "friends," once again I thought I was all alone.
Then I began to understand, more and more clearly, that rape, violence, and intimate partner abuse are endemic to the community--and that the community shames and shuns the very people who try to change this.
I don't know how to change things yet. I have some ideas. Collecting resources and stories in a centralized database would be a start; fetlife is "ghettoized," and for those "out of the loop," it's hard to keep up with what's happened and what's going on. Creating "best practices" guidelines, highlighting local sexual violence resources, and writing up easy-to-understand guides about buzz words like" victim blaming" or "rape culture" might be another start.
Mostly, though, I want a platform to be angry. Anger isn't just okay--anger is what gets shit done.
Then I began to understand, more and more clearly, that rape, violence, and intimate partner abuse are endemic to the community--and that the community shames and shuns the very people who try to change this.
I don't know how to change things yet. I have some ideas. Collecting resources and stories in a centralized database would be a start; fetlife is "ghettoized," and for those "out of the loop," it's hard to keep up with what's happened and what's going on. Creating "best practices" guidelines, highlighting local sexual violence resources, and writing up easy-to-understand guides about buzz words like" victim blaming" or "rape culture" might be another start.
Mostly, though, I want a platform to be angry. Anger isn't just okay--anger is what gets shit done.
About Me: Criseyde
I study something extremely boring in a humanities department.
If you really need to know, I identify as a switch. So don't tell me I demonize tops, because I am one. Sometimes. When I'm feeling sexy. And don't have to write a paper (which is never).
Find me on Fetlife: fetlife.com/Criseyde (I get called a troll a lot. :D)